5 LIFE LESSONS I WISH I KNEW EARLIER (celebrating 1 year on YouTube)


The one thing in life that is constant
is change. We’re constantly changing, We’re constantly growing, we’re
constantly evolving. In this video I’m going to share five life lessons that have helped me change in the last year, and I wish I’d known these life lessons earlier. But
better late than never, and I’m sharing them in the hopes that they could help
somebody else. If you’re interested keep watching. Hello hello, welcome back to the Whole
Happy Life. My name is Ria. For today’s video we’re gonna talk about life
lessons, and this is not something I would normally talk about in the channel, but today is an apt occasion. Today I’m celebrating one year on YouTube. I posted
my first video last year in July, and it’s already been a year. Time really
does fly and I’ve learned a lot in the last year. A lot of the life lessons I’ve
learned have been from being on YouTube and I think being on YouTube has helped
me grow as a person, and I wanted to share the ways in which that’s helped me
grow, and I really hope that some of these life lessons resonate with you. I
do recognize we’re all different so they may not, but I hope that you can take
something away from this video that’s useful. But before we dive in I wanted to
say a very quick thank you for everybody who supported the channel. When I started
the channel my goal was about 10,000 subscribers for the first year. I wasn’t
planning to do much. I didn’t really know how many hours a week I could commit to
creating videos, but I’m really happy that I stuck by it even though I kind of
fell off the wagon several times in between. But today we have 30,000
subscribers and that is three times what I hoped for, so it’s definitely something
that I’m very grateful for, and thank you for your continued support, and I hope to
see you around again and again on the channel. Anyway let’s dive into the life
lessons. First life lesson is: life is about progress not perfection. if you
happen to be someone who has perfectionistic tendencies or if you’re
perfectionist, this will probably resonate with you. I’ve been a
perfectionist since I was a child, it was just the way it was raised. My parents
had very, very high expectations for me, and I was under a lot of pressure. I
realized that high standards are good in some ways, but having standards that are
perfection is unattainable. It’s stressful, and it’s just not worth it, and
I feel that a lot of times perfection has held me back. Last year there are
many many occasions when I would re-shoot videos because I wasn’t happy with them, and I’ve since realized that no matter what I do I’m not going to be happy with
something on occasion, and that’s okay. The output I put up on
YouTube does not need to be perfect. The things I do in my personal life do not
need to be perfect. Perfection is exhausting. So I’ve started to change my
approach when it comes to perfection, and I think I’ll do a video on perfection
later on. Something more detailed. But the one thing I wanted to share here was – I
started to tell myself 80% is good enough. So if I’m doing any work – I think –
is it 80% there? Is it 80% of what I want it to be? If it is, it’s good enough. Putting in the effort to get it to 100% is it worth it because it’s going to take so
much time, and I’m going to get exhausted, and in the grand scheme of things it
probably doesn’t even matter. The 80% is good enough can be applied to things
beyond your work. So as an example let’s say you’re trying to eat healthy – a lot
of times people start eating healthy, they try to do it so perfectly at the
beginning, and they succeed, but then after a week or two they’re not able to
be as perfect and then they fall off the wagon. When you’re making any sort of
long-term change in life, anything that you want to continue for a while it’s
very difficult to remain perfect. So 80% is good enough. If you eat well 80% of
the time, and 20% of the time you’re not eating as well as you would like, that’s
okay. It’s about finding balance that helps
you actually do something long-term. Number two: comparing yourself to others
takes the joy away from life. I was raised in a way where I was always
compared to other people, especially when it came to academic performance. So
that’s why I put a lot of pressure on myself, and till today I still compare
myself to other people, and I finally recognized that it’s really an unhealthy
mindset, because no matter what I do, I’m never happy with it. If I compare myself
to someone who’s doing better, and here’s the deal: no matter what you do in life
someone else is going to be doing it better than you, and we are all here on a
different path, we all have different skills, and for us to compare ourselves
to someone else, whether it’s a sibling, or a stranger, or a relative, it doesn’t
make sense, because it’s like comparing apples and oranges. You can’t really
compare them. We’re all different. When I started on YouTube I used to compare
myself to other YouTubers and think that my growth wasn’t
as much as their growth. But here’s the thing: we’re all different. we’re all on
different paths, and I’ve finally come to terms with that, and I no longer compare
myself to others. I only compare myself to myself. I was trying to improve myself
and that’s pretty much good enough, and I wanted to say a quote that I found
on Pinterest, and I thought it was very apt. Don’t compare your life to others. There is no comparison between the Sun and the Moon, they both shine when it’s their time. Number three consistency is key,
especially when you’re trying to make long-term change, and this can apply to
everyone. Whether you’re someone who’s on YouTube, or if you’re a writer, if you’re
an artist, if you’re someone trying to lose weight, if you’re someone trying to
form meditation as a habit, all of these things require some consistency, and
consistency is something I am not very good at, but I now recognize how
important it is. If you’ve been following me on a channel you’ll know that I’m not
the most consistent with my posting, and I am sorry for that. I have had several
family issues this year so it has become rather difficult to be consistent with
my posting. But I recognize that no matter what life throws at you, if you
want to make something a long-term change, you have to be consistent. So for
me it’s about my YouTube channel. I have to be consistent no matter what comes my
way. Even if I post once a week that’s good enough. I don’t have to post twice a
week. That was my goal initially. If you’re someone who’s trying to do
healthy eating, there going to be times when things get in the way, but
consistency is still important if you want to make it a long term change.
Number four: you can’t please everyone and no matter what you do you’re going to
face some criticism, and this is something I’ve always known that I can’t
please everyone, but because I have that people pleaser personality, I’ve always
tried to keep everybody happy, and being on YouTube that’s impossible. You’re
going to have people who really like what you put out, and then you’re gonna
have people who don’t like what you’re going to put out, and it’s not just about
being on YouTube. You could be whoever. There will always be someone who will
criticize you for the way you are, they criticize you for the way you dress,
criticize you for things like the way you raise your child. There are just people out there who will criticize you. When I
received my first hate comment, not constructive criticism, I actually like
constructive criticism. When I got my first hate comment, I think I retreated
into my shell for a week, and it hurt me quite a bit because I put a lot of
effort in the channel. But I recognize no matter what I do I can’t keep everybody
happy. It’s small things, sometimes it’s stuff like the cats. Not everyone likes
the cats on the channel, and I can’t please everybody, because for every
person that doesn’t like cats on the channel, I have a hundred people who do
like the cats. So it really is about being authentic to myself and doing
whatever I want to do, and not worrying about what other people think, because if
I continue to think about others and I continue to try to please everybody it’s
just going to be mentally exhausting and it’s just impossible. Number five: having a clear vision and setting goals can really help with the things that you struggle with. I do recognize goal-setting is not for
everybody. I think it’s for certain personality types. If you don’t have that
personality type, it might not be for you. I’m an INTJ personality by the MBTI personality type and for me writing
lists, writing things down, having strategies is very important, and I think
in that sense goal-setting really works with my personality. I’ve been doing
goal-setting for a few years now with a friend of mine, but most of my goals were
personal goals, they weren’t professional goals. I don’t think I’ve ever done
professional goal-setting properly. I didn’t have proper structure to my
professional goals, but this year I decided that for both my personal and
professional goals, I wanted to have a little bit more structure, and I wanted
to have a clear vision. So I created a goal-setting workbook
earlier this year, I will put the link in the description box below, and that
goal-setting workbook has really helped me quite a bit, because it helped me
figure out where I was struggling, it helped me figure out what it is I want to
focus on this year, and it helped me figure out strategies. I think strategies
to do your goals to get to where you want to get are very very important. I’ve
been using the workbook since January, and I have seen a lot of growth compared
to previous years. I’ve seen growth professionally, and I’ve also seen growth
on a personal level, and I think it’s really helped me when it comes to my
YouTube channel. It’s helped me figure out where I want to go. When I was starting out I had no plans for the YouTube
channel, no clear vision. I think I had maybe 300 subscribers in January. Not
that many. Now six months later I have 30,000 and I think that has been as a
result of setting goals, having strategies, and really remaining on the
path as opposed to just kind of trying stuff out. I think trying stuff out is a
good way to start something, but if you want to do something long-term and make
it a change, goal setting can be very helpful, and it’s not just for
professional things, so for personal things too. So let’s say you’re trying to
eat healthier or you’re trying a new exercise regimen, having set goals can
really help you. Besides creating goals I think it’s really important to review
the goals regularly. I try to review all my goals, professional and personal, with
a friend every month, and I think that’s really helped. I hope you enjoyed this
video, it is a very personal video to create because a lot of these are life lessons
that apply to me, and I do hope that some of them have resonated with you. If you
have any life lessons that you’d like to share with the YouTube community, please
let me know in the comment box below. Anyway if you liked the video give it a
thumbs up and don’t forget to subscribe. I will see you in the next video!

About the author

Comments

  1. My life lesson recently, which may not be profound to others, but it was my own personal "Ah-ha!" moment of me coming to the realization that I need to be more responsible for my finances, and not relying solely on my husband to carry it all.

  2. For learning certain lessons of your life you have to commit your own mistakes.. And one such mistake i or rather we as a couple committed for many years was "Taking money for granted".. And never realised the importance of money till it hit us hard.. So this is the life lesson i want to share… Never mess up with your relationship with money.. When your relation with money change..unfortunately your other relations do change😷

  3. Just came across your video on reducing sugar intake and continued to watch the other videos. Loved and got subsription right away!!
    With Academic pressure and comparison…if I may ask, do you have any Indian connection? That's a society where it's all about academic perfection! 💖

  4. Thank you so much for sharing on here. You make so many good points and have given me much food for thought. I just “found “ your videos on YT today and am getting so much from the ones I’ve watched so far. Melody from North Carolina (USA).

  5. 119K a year and bit later. Wow, be proud, you share incredible insights and practical tips that are possible to implement. Thank you! Thumbs UP!

  6. You are awesome. I am a new subscriber, glad I found you. Very sensible contents and well presented. Most of all I love your cats. I have four furry babies and I live them dearly.
    Plz continue your great work. Would love to hear how you take care of your skin. I have seen one clip of your on healthy skin. Is there anything you do.
    Best wishes. Will continue watching for sure. Best wishes

  7. I think as a social care worker that people who are aggressively hateful to something (especially if their hate doesn't make any sense), are people who are very unhappy with their lives. They project their feelings on you, but in reality they hate something inside themselves, some situations and circumstances that are happening in their lives at the moment that they cannot change or they think they cannot change. They cannot throw these negatives emotions on people around them because there will be consequences so they supress their emotions and "throw" on you, thinking (or doing it unconsciously actually) that it is the safest way because there will be no punishment and consequences.

  8. Love your advices. It seems like you have done a huge amount of self learning. I am continually learning as well.

  9. Thank God i found ur channel! Very informative and helpful since im also trying to live a healthy life and having a good mindset ❤

  10. Hi there Ria , just wanted to let you know that watching your videos has helped me a lot in more ways than I can list here . I appreciate your honesty and intelligence and your effort to help others . A very sincere 💕Thank You💕

  11. Thank you for this inspiring video. The one lesson I learned in life that I am thankful for now is that I learned how to save money and be a wise spender. It made a big impact on my life and now I love my life better than before. Saving money is fairly easy as long as you are willing to change how you handle your finances.

  12. LIVING IN THE MOMENTS 💗FEEL GRATEFUL ERVERYDAY💟 LOVE AND TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY💚 FORGIVE PEOPLE WHO DONE HARMFUL THINGS TO YOU💟 Be able to live FINANCALLY INDEPENDANTLY without any financial help from others💗 FEEL JOYFUL EVERYDAY BY HELPING OTHERS IN NEED. 💗LET GO OF ALL THE BURDENS IN YOUR LIFE. 💜ABLE TO OVERCOME ALL THE ADVERSITIES IN LIFE❤ WILLING TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY AND CONSEQUENCES FOR EVERY BAD DECISIONS YOU MADE . 💖WORRY AND LOOK AFTER YOURSELF.

  13. Hi Ria! I just found your channel tonight – this is the third or fourth video I've watched. I had already subscribed after the first one, but this was my favorite. You are lovely! The cat clips made me smile every single time. I could relate to all of your lessons – especially consistency & comparing yourself to others. Perfectionism too! I've been trying to rethink my own channel to reflect more of what makes me happy. (Still meditating on it:) Making the videos became more of a chore than something I felt passionate about. This was inspiring to watch. HUGE congrats on your youtube success! Thank you for sharing this video and all the others. xo

  14. Ria..This is truly one of the most valuable video iv seen in past years. You raised such key life points and the way you speak honestly and relate it to your own experience makes it so helpful ..you have certainly shined a light for others and myself ..I think it's the sharing that makes us be able to form ourselves and our clarity through sharing is a gift. I would like to post my own lessons soon as well in this comment.Thank you Ria..you are like a good friend.Lia xx

  15. I've just discovered you through your collaboration with Vera at Simple Happy Zen. I'm loving you, your content AND your cats!! 😀

  16. Thank you for the video. I shared it with my teenage daughter who is struggling with finding courage in herself. These are fabulous life lessons and you explained them beautifully!

  17. This is my second video i am watching on this channel, very inspiring and talking about the strategies and life goals are the things i am working these days and your experiences and thoughts helps me to create my vision. Thanks for the great work and sharing. Keep up.

  18. I just discovered your channel and I must say it's definitely my favorite on youtube at the moment. I have been binge watching you for the past 2 days haha. You're real, simple, natural and all these can easily be seen. A very, very late happy anniversary and all the best to you! Lots of love from Romania 🙂

  19. Do you have the video on 'Perfection'? I struggle and have a hard time letting go of 'being perfect'. I enjoyed watching this video because I can relate to it!

  20. Congratulations! I'm a few months late, but I found your Chanel just a month ago. Seriously, I wish you a very successful life, personal and professional. Your message is always so positive and honest. I can tell you truly care, you keep your Chanel not just to make money, but to help people and this is admirable. Congratulations! xx

  21. Although I dislike cats intensely, I do like to see your cats on the Chanel. They are very beautiful. As long as they stay with you and not visit me I
    will continue to view them from an aesthetic point of view. I love your Chanel.

  22. you areso calm and natural…so gentle and honest…this video in particular very relatable to me because I want to quit my job after working there for a decade! But I feel I lost myself there completely and feel unhappy…I am starting to a new path in my life soon, learning graphics design and being more creative as I used to be as a younger myself:) This video is very encouraging:)

  23. I am baffled by the continued similarities between you and me! I say the "80% perfect is good enough" thing a lot! Also, unfortunately but interestingly, 2018 was a very tough year for me as well personally (as I lost my dad). I did find one difference though – I am an ESFJ. But I also do love and crave structure. I also have perfectionist tendencies which I am trying to reduce. I also love quotes! A life lesson I would like to share: "Practice gratitude everyday. No matter how hard life is, you can always find 3 things to be grateful for everyday". I do it as a part of my daily meditation.

  24. I am a perfectionist too. I started my YouTube channel a couple of months ago. I was clueless about editing and even how to create a video. So, recently I thought about redoing some of my videos that I have done because I hate the way I recorded them. Lesson #1 Life is about progress not protection. That was for me. 80% is good enough. ❤️.

  25. Thank you for sharing what worked for you, and please don’t stop including your cats, I lost my18 year old cat in January of 2018 had him since he was 3 month s old, so please ignore the hate comments and congrats on you channel

  26. Hi Ria I love your videos and love love love your beautiful cats ! Your videos are very helpful and inspiring ! Don’t let mean people ever effect what you do just keep on keeping on !

  27. With regards to the cats: I feel like they are such a well-suited addition to your content. They are experts at enjoying life, life balance and all that. So they are never a distraction to the rest of your content/message, only an addition & emphasis 😊 Keep the cats please ❤😍❤

  28. Ria you are a lovely, honest and very genuine person and your videos have been extremely helpful and very positive and motivationg ! lots of love x

  29. Hello Ria! I'd just like to thank you for all your lessons and advice. I've been learning so much! Keep doing what you do, you really touch our lives. And I do love your cats!! They're so sweet 😉 keep them on the channel!

  30. This video was very helpful for me. I've been thinking about becoming a Youtuber for some time now but I am also a perfectionist and so I always end up not feeling good enough to start. Thank you for sharing these lessons and keeping them simple. I am also able to relate with your personality pretty well!

  31. Damn you beautifulgirl MashaAllah BarakAllah hu I AM IN LOVE WITH YOUR CHANNEL. I LOVE ITTTTTTTT. I LOVE YOUR VIDEOS.

  32. I love your cats!! I watch videos like this to be inspired, but I still like to be entertained and get a smile once in awhile, even while listening to something serious.

  33. In my life my parents used to be so strict in terms of education especially..and I tried so hard..at the end I realised that my friends who had less pressure in this way achieved the same or even more than me. So I'm teaching myself to be easy going with my kid.

  34. Hi, Ria! Thank you for each and every video, whether
    1. People tend to criticize others who are not perfect but when it comes to themselves, they make excuses for why they are not perfect. 🙄
    2. I was raised the same way, always being compared to my older brother… this actually lasted until I was 48!
    3. Consistency… I fall short in this area… BIG TIME! I’d love to learn how to do this!
    4. Pleasing everyone: If someone doesn’t like your videos, THEY DON’T NEED TO WATCH THEM! If someone doesn’t like a particular video or two, THEY DON’T NEED TO WATCH THEM! ❤️❤️❤️
    5. Goal setting: Another area in which I need help. I tend to get lost in the details…

    Keep up your beautiful work! I learn SOOOO much from you! AND I LOVE YOUR KITTIES!!!! 😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻

  35. I just found your channel, and I love it! Your information is well needed and given in a clear and concise manner. Thank you so much, and continue to be awesome!

  36. At my age 63 you really come to realize what really matters to yourself you come into your own and you don’t care who or what people say or think it’s about how you feel about yourself. People will always have something to say good or bad. I feel like who cares. I like myself I am my own best friend and I like me a lot and I am happy with me. So that is all that matters in the end.

  37. I really love your channel… your content is full of knowledge and worth sharing… thanks for starting such a beautiful channel… I am grateful that I got it on YouTube 😊😊😊… keep it up… good luck 😊❤

  38. I just bumped into this channel by coincidence and I like it very much. I think you are really good at it! you are informative, interesting and have such a relaxing and calming attitude, I just love it! congrats!

  39. Love your kind and open personality. Love your beautiful Kitty too. All very uplifting and refreshing. Keep it up! Cheers. 🌷 😊 🍀

  40. watching Ria is a key to my success in consistency.😎 I do get lost in lots of things…this one takes back to my own track…..and it's your 2nd YouTube anniversary 😝

  41. You are amazing person and I love your video's 💖💖❤❤💜💜💗💗 and I love the cats 🐱🐱🐱🐈🐈🐈

  42. Dear Ria, I have the same mental structure as yours, driven by perfectionism and selfsacrifice. Thank you for sharing, because I feel less lonely and because I am starting to learn the exact same things you shared. A big Thank you!

  43. ⭐⭐ MAKE 2020 AMAZING! Life Goals Workbook ⭐⭐ is finally here! You can download it from Gumroad here 👇:

    https://gumroad.com/l/2020-goals-workbook

    If you have any issues with the transaction, you can email me: ria [at] thewholehappylife [dot] com .

    Thank you for your support! I hope this workbook helps you achieve your goals and dreams in 2020! ❤️❤️

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *