6 Fun Ways You Can Die In Noita | Noita Impressions


I keep dying a lot in Noita. But, fortunately
enough, dying a lot in Noita is a lot of fun. Nolla Games’s roguelike in which, quote,
“every pixel is simulated,” has you delve into procedurally-generated dungeons using
wands loaded up with all manner of different spell combos with which you can explode bits
of wall, obliterate red-eyed crawly bastards, and discover all of the unique and exciting
ways in which you can bring about your own demise. Noita is about as equally effective as simulating
countless different ways in which you can spectacularly s**t on it as it is at simulating
all of its other pixels, actually. In fact, rather than just tell you about Noita’s
many qualities, I’m going to tell you about six ways you can die in the game, as a medium
through which you’ll come to understand what it’s all about. If you can’t wait
to watch me die over and over again, why not like, subscribe, and hit the bell. Otherwise,
you might find yourself sat at the top of a mound of exploding popcorn. There’s a lot of fire in Noita, and it can
burn you in a number of different ways. Some strange man with a bunch of dynamite might
lob it at you, and the resulting explosion could catch the wooden support beams inside
the cavern alight, triggering a massive blaze that you get caught in. A demon wot chucks
fireballs about the place could chuck lots of them fireballs wot it chucks at your face
until you die. And then, there’s… oil. While wandering about the cavernous depths,
I knocked down a lantern with a spark spell from my wand. I didn’t really think much
of it, and walked over it to get where I wanted to go. What I hadn’t realised was that when
the lantern had fallen over, a part of it had broken and spilled out all of the oil
that it contained for fuel onto the ground, and that oil was now on me. I stopped at the
edge of a drop, thinking that I would just stop and not fall down it. But… I slipped,
because you get slippery when you’re oily, like in real life. Can confir– When you’re all greased up, you’ll naturally
be more prone to getting set on fire. And, once you do catch alight, it’s a bit tricky
to stop being on fire, unless you dunk your entire body into a pool of water. Only problem
there is, oil floats on top of water, dunnit? So, in a fashion quite similar to horrifying
footage of burning oil spills in the Mexican Gulf, you might end up sat underwater while
the surface above you is ablaze, which is only a little bit f**king scary. What could be worse than that? Well, perhaps
it’d be falling into a large vat of oil, only for a lantern to fall and set alight
that vat of oil, the oil then burning at a rapid rate, the flames chasing you down to
the bottom of the vat, you being covered in oil so there not really being any escape,
and the walls that make up the vat not burning down in time for you to climb out of the now
blazing, firey vat of hot oil that also contains you, blazing and firey, covered in hot oil. The various liquids in Noita can do different
things, too. Water, for instance, makes you resistant to fire, because you’re soggy–all
liquids except, y’know, oil, do that. Slime slows you down when you try to move around
because it’s all sticky and stuff, acid burns you slowly over time, and then each
of the potions do different sorts of things if you dip yourself into pools of them, like
this one that will randomly teleport you to areas around the map. Blood, if enough of it pools up (and one of
the modifiers that you can pick up between runs makes more of it come out of you and
other things, so that’s likely) also does things if you dip yourself in some of it.
As well as the staple of it being a non-oil liquid and therefore protecting you against
fire damage, it can also increase the critical hit chance of anything covered in it. Oh yeah,
all these status effects won’t just affect you, if a nasty dungeon monster gets covered
in slime, for instance, they’ll move slowly too. Something that all liquids can do as well,
is make you drown. Submerge yourself in a you-height puddle of water, oil, slime, and
yes, even blood, and your oxygen meter (which I didn’t notice was a thing until it was
too late) will drain all the way to the bottom of the bar, and you’ll just die. I almost
drowned in a pool of my own blood in real life once after having a chronic nosebleed
while unconscious, and I have to say I really can’t recommend it. One of those wizard dipping sauc–sorry, potions,
is a polymorph elixir. Dunk yourself in, and you’ll be transformed into any number of
different creatures. One time, I turned into a big, gross, wriggly bug thing, and then
there was this time that I got turned into a flying sheep with bat win–oh, wait, I guess
bug wings now. I couldn’t cast spells, pick up items, or
check my inventory, probably because I was a sheep and sheep can’t really do that sort
of thing. But I could flap my wings and fly about. I was doing just that, buzzing around
and pondering whether this is what clouds actually secretly were, wondering how I might
be able to finish a run of Noita now that I’m a sheep with wings who can’t do much,
and then off-screen, I heard the distinct sound of a shotgun being pumped, and before
I knew it, I wasn’t a sheep anymore, I was just a puddle of wool and offal. This is a bit s**t when it happens to you,
but it’s also a really useful tactic for combatting some particularly nasty foes, like
this fire demon that just keeps chucking fireballs and just won’t die. Sheep, as it turns out,
are pretty frail things compared to gribbly cave monsters and ballsy wizards, so if I
were to chuck a polymorph potion at the demon (which is something you can do if you pick
them up instead of shooting holes into them every time you see them like I do) then they’d
turn into a sheep, or another easily-squishable creature, and job’s a good’un. Or at least, that’s something you could
do. Every time I happened upon a polymorph potion, I got a bit too excited and just made
it leak about the place before I could get around to picking any of them up. There are these nasty acid-slime-ball-things
that float about the corridors of the caverns that’ll spit massive great corrosive lugies
at you. It’s properly nasty, and many a time it’s resulted in my untimely demise.
These lugies, when they don’t hit you, will leave tiny puddles of acid on the ground,
but not as much as if you shoot them once or twice without killing them. If you do that,
they’ll start squirting out acid blood as if they were some weird, snotty xenomorph,
and it’ll pool up on the ground and get you all coated in nasty corrosive acid stuff
if you step into it. You can also find this same acid in big open
vats and toxic waste barrels that you can kick about, so once again the acid proves
advantageous in the right situations. Kick a barrel into a big gang of enemies, pew it
with your wand so that it spills out, and watch as they all dissolve into mush. Hell,
you could even tactically pop some holes into a slimeboy floating above some other monsters,
so that it bleeds onto all of them. There are a lot of ways that you can die in
real life that are properly s**t and depressing. One of those ways is suffocating on carbon
monoxide. Or just dying because of smoke inhalation generally, like how I eventually will. But
as it turns out, gamifying these really naff means through which you meet your maker can
make them quite fun and entertaining. And, in a game where you have a percentage counter
to keep track of how saturated you are in various different liquids, it’s no shock
that the smoke in the game is as well thought-through as well. When there’s a lot of fire in Noita, it
bellows out great big plumes of smoke. Because that’s what fire does in real life. If that
smoke rising up into the air doesn’t have anywhere to keep going up and it hits a ceiling
or other obstacle, it’ll start to gather and pool up. Eventually, this’ll form into
a big cloud of nasty nasty smoke. Which you do not want to find yourself trapped in. Like
I did, after starting a bloody great big fire and perching myself on a tiny ledge above
it so I didn’t get burned alive. I didn’t burst into flames, so that much
was a success! I did, however, lose my oxygen supply very rapidly, on account of all that
carbon monoxide filling up my lungs instead. I’d imagine that, were I not just really
bad at video games, I could use this tactically to smoke out areas of enemies. Punch a hole
in the floor of a room, light a big fire pit, and wait for all the smoke to flood in. Either
that, or I could do what I normally do when there’s smoke about and just hotbo– Perhaps the most abundant means through which
I became an ex-Wizard was through getting blown up, either by the hands of a monster
or by my own. I got exploded so many times and in so many different ways that I could
probably make an entire video that was just a montage of all the ways I got exploded. One time, I’d found a really big, shiny
new wand, hadn’t clocked exactly what it did, and when testing it, a big flaming fireball
shot out the front, but a tiny one also popped out of the back, turning me into bloody pulpy
mush. Then, there was the bit where I was caught
precariously levitating above a demon chucking great big fireballs at me, until one of them
finally impacted and turned me into a bloodied wizard firework. Another time, I’d respawned to find a really
lovely treasure chest sat in front of me, got all properly excited, cracked the thing
open, and then IRL dissociated for a brief moment, which means I was caught completely
off-guard by the f**king bomb that had come out of the chest and was now sat at my feet.
So, I got blown up. I didn’t die in this one but felt it was
worth mentioning: there are these pools of water in the checkpoint areas, presumably
so you can rinse off all the slime or put yourself out if you’re on fire, and sometimes
they have fish in them? Anyway, I misclicked while holding the wand with the bomb dispensing
spell, and the fish exploded, and their corpses rained down on top of me. It was horrifying. I’d been living under such a bloody great
rock in recent times, my vision fogged up by uncustomizable tricorns and my eardrums
filled with the sound of rampant honking, that I hadn’t actually caught onto Noita
existing at all before getting the chance to have a play around with the game. This
meant that all it had to offer was like one big exciting series of surprises, but I think
that even if I had known a lot about the game beforehand, it’d still catch me off-guard
with everything it has to offer, like a magician pulling out more and more handkerchiefs from
their sleeve, or I suppose, like a wizard unwillingly squeezing more and more blood
out of their arteries. I can’t wait to keep playing now that it’s out, and to continue
to uncover even more exciting ways in which I can die. If you’ve given Noita a go and died in a
particularly spectacular way, let us know in the comments. Perhaps you found this video
helpful in developing your next fantastical demise strategy? If it was, you could give
it a like, and subscribe to Rock Paper Shotgun. We’ve also done some other videos where
we take a dumb way of looking at a video game too far, like how Rebel Galaxy Outlaw is like
Ice Road Truckers in space, or how Untitled Goose Game is like Metal Gear Solid but if
you were a goose. Whatever you decide to do with the rest of your day, I’d like to say
a massive cheers for watching, and hopefully we’ll see you again soon!

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Comments

  1. The amount of depth to your deaths is really fun. I bought it and have had no regrets with the game. My in game choices though? Plenty of regrets.

  2. This is a really interesting engine that powers a game that is just… not very good. It's a bit like finding out your childhood friend has the coolest Lego set ever, and then plays with them by just smashing them together like an ape. I don't know. It's an interesting foundation, but the gameplay dynamics punish any exploration of said pixel physics. Cool liquid physics? Cool fire? Nope, best to just avoid it all outright. It just winds of playing like a weird combination of Flappy Bird and… Spelunky.

  3. The concept seems cool, I just cant get past the presentation, I feel very over pixel style games nowadays with there being only a few exceptions. I'm sure it's a lot of fun, I just wish indie devs would step away from the pixel art style for bit.

  4. A few times while fleeing from mobs of enemies I've flown upward, dropping bombs behind me… then run out of float-juice and fallen into the enemy-filled blast zone. Getting buffeted around by the bad guys for an agonizing second two before self-obliteration is always fun.

  5. One note: "acid" and "toxic sludge" are two different liquids in this game. Acid (dark green) melts through things (and is consumed in doing so), gives off flammable gas, and will kill you quite quickly. Toxic sludge is much more common (since it doesn't immediately annihilate and can spawn in pools and vats), and does damage slowly (also, it won't actually kill you; it stops doing damage around 5% health).
    Also, whiskey is another flammable liquid (aside from oil). Do not attempt to jump into a vat of whiskey if you are on fire.

  6. Aw I need a babies mode that saves per level :p I mean that's not so bad though is it roguelike enthusiasts reading this?

  7. I've had a couple of very cool not deaths via kicking something at an enemy projectile. Also for anyone reading THERE'S A SECRET REPLAY GIF MAKER IT'S AWESOME

  8. Screw this game. I just grinded for so long and reached a spot that I thought was safe. Little did I know my want electricied the water on my body and O instantly died.

  9. yesterday i was with a really good set of wands and perks, but then everything was crushed as soon as a enormous worm appeared from the top of my screen and killed me in 1 hit.

  10. How about chugging some chaotic polymorph, turning into a little worm, drilling into the temple and getting stuck inside a wall

  11. Might not be on topic, but once i found a wand that had a really fast fire rate, so i slapped the chainsaw spell on it. ALSO i had the glass perk on me ALSO some random giant worm decided to drill through the fucking temple which, in turn, angered the gods, which fucking summoned a skeleton that yeets giant purple balls of doom at you that are HOMING ALSO the skeleton has a super deflecto sheild around him so i guess i had to get up close and personal to the fucker, tanking one purple ball, getting into the shield bubble of the skeleton, activating my super fast chainsaw wand and. Literally killin the fucker in one tenth of a second, he just turned to bone dust, then i chainsawed the gigantic worm that angered the gods earlier and drank its yellow blood that got me fucking high, as in the colors startex changing and pulsing and the sounds became distorted. So yeah, dont remember how that run ended, probably died to a fucking firefly but i had a blast

  12. Once, that huge worm thing bored through holy mountain and the gods blamed me for it, so they sent an angel of death with an everything-shield after me to kill me. When I scrammed out of there and the exit collapsed, I managed to time it well enough to kill it with collapsing rubble. All's good, right? Nope, there was another one waiting for me at the next holy mountain, and I got blasted.

  13. Picked up the Glass Cannon perk (5X damage, ~5X AoE on all spells, max health locked to 50) and dunked in Berserkium (2X damage, ~2X AoE). Then I tried to bomb away a wall, and backed away as far as I could, knowing that that’s about how far away you need to be to be out of the blast radius of a normal bomb while under the effects of Berserkium. I did not, however, account for having Glass Cannon. 4 seconds and about 1000 self-inflicted damage later, a significant fraction of the layer I was on was simply gone. Along with me.

  14. Funniest way of exploding myself was with throwing a bomb while covered in berserium and having the perk glascannon, dang that exploded the whole map away, the fun part is, even with glascannon alone everything on the screen gets blasted see: https://steamuserimages-a.akamaihd.net/ugc/775106514385622792/9253396AD13963DBDEC568306FCE5372783C1C1C/

  15. I got turned into a monster by some chaotic polymorph liquid and the monster I turned into was deathly allergic to liquid, since I hadn't yet left the liquid I exploded from the very same liquid that turned me into the damn thing in the first place… it was a good run lol

  16. I found a new wand that shot black holes and had extra shots when I got to the safe room so I messed with my wands and found out the black hole can destroy the stone of the room so I shot it downwards to see if there's anything hidden there only to die to a I think goat god who blew me up into tiny wizard bits before I knew what had happened

  17. I died by getting excited by a spell called sea of lava, so I cast it in the coal mines and flooded them and flew away because I'm not stupid and then realized I was out of levitation and dropped into the lava so it turns out I actually am stupid

  18. Big fan of this game….BUT I am not going to watch all of this video because I like trying to figure out the game myself….just like the good 'ole days!

  19. You can also polymorph into a more aggressive enemy that shoots homing projectiles… and then morph back into yourself and watch all those projectile do a 180 and home directly in on you.

  20. Glass cannon to fire nuke. terrible accident occurred.
    99% water 1% oil NOW THATS HOT
    correction. toxic saps your life, acid MELTS you alive.
    berserkium and explosives.

  21. Got a perk that made me teleport whenever I took damage.
    Got stuck in acid.
    Every single second, I teleported to some new, precarious situation. I also managed to essentially speedrun through the game, skipping past an entire area that I'd been stuck in before, before dying horribly to a bunch of bewildered soldiers.

  22. Very rare ocurance get killed by player 2 lol theres more than you out there. Lol theres other yous out there. Doppelgangers

  23. I stumbled into an area that announced itself as a "Dragon Cave" and saw a large egg shaped stone and decided that it would be a brilliant idea to use my short range digging wand to dig into the egg shaped stone. Went great right up until I was consumed by the massive fire worm that come out of said egg. Don't know what I expected.

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