Dave Chappelle Is a Magical Party Wizard – Pete Lee – Unmic’d


– And he goes, “Dave Chappelle
will take care of it” and then he just kept walking. Dave Chappelle is wizard. He is a party magic wizard. (lively jazz music) Hi, my name is Pete Lee and this is why you say
yes to Dave Chappelle. All right, so I was sitting
at the Comedy Cellar, I’m all alone at
the comics’ table, and Dave Chappelle comes
in, sits across from me, and he’s just looking at me ’cause Dave Chappelle has an
ability that I do not have. He can just sit still
and make eye contact with somebody without talking. That’s an amazing talent. He leans over and
he goes, “I’m Dave.” I wanted to play it cool like
I didn’t know who he was. “I’m Pete.” We’re sitting there
and he’s smoking. You can’t smoke indoors
in New York City in 2018! So I said that to him,
’cause I’m a rule follower. “Can you smoke in here?” And he goes, “Dave Chappelle
can smoke wherever he wants!” And I was like,
“oh, that’s cool.” Then he offered me a cigarette and I was like, oh, he thinks
I’m cool enough to smoke. But I didn’t wanna
cough the whole time, so I didn’t take it. And then he goes, “do
you like parties, Pete?” And I was like, “I
love parties, Dave.” I don’t even know
if I like parties. And he goes, “do you wanna
come to my party this weekend?” I’ve been working on
being cool and chill in front of people
and not too much, so I think I was like,
“oh, Dave, I sure would!” He finishes his cigarette
and then he gets up and he just walks away
and I call after him, “but Dave, you don’t
even know my last name.” And he goes, “Dave Chappelle
will take care of it” and then he just kept walking. So I was like all right, I guess I’m not
going to this party. Later on, this
lady comes up to me and she taps me on the shoulder. “Hey, I got you
into Dave’s party.” And I was like Dave
Chappelle is a wizard. He is a party magic wizard. And it turns out that Dave does
this thing every single year called the Comedian’s Ball. He treats comedians to
a crazy party experience that they probably
couldn’t afford otherwise. Side bar, Dave Chappelle
could’ve given us all healthcare for, like, an entire year
instead of buying us this party, but I’ll take it. So I show up to this place. Questlove is there. Chris Rock was there. Also, all my friends are there ’cause Dave invited them
too, ’cause he’s the best. I just think that it’s drinks. Oh cool, he invited
us to this cool place and there’s drinks. And then all of a sudden,
this naked lady on a trapeze just starts swinging
all over us. I was raised by a feminist mom, so I was like don’t
look, Pete, y’know? And she’s swinging
over us going “hey!” And I was looking at her
like you’re a person. Then the show starts, so
that wasn’t even the show. There’s a burlesque
show that’s gonna start. Opening act comes out. This is the opener! She pours like fire-breather
liquid into her hoo-ha and then queefs fire
out into the air. I’m a pretty clean comedian, so that’s gonna be all I’m
gonna tell you about the show, ’cause that’s how crazy it was. But the moral of the story is if Dave Chappelle invites
you to a party, you go! (echoing beeps)

About the author

Comments

  1. I'm actually glad I watched this three minute video. Now I know to not waste my time with any more of this guy ever again.

  2. Damn wtf u all being so mean for? If you don’t want to hear the story just leave, don’t get mad cause this video didn’t cure your boredness/loneliness/evil hearted ness

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *