David Spade Accidentally Volunteered to Pay for Adam Sandler’s $9,000 Dinner


-Welcome back to the show. -They like us
hanging out together. -They like us hanging out.
-It’s fun. Thanks, guys. -Today’s a special day for all
of us because that you’re here,
first of all. We love having you here. But, also,
today is your birthday, buddy. -Happy birthday.
-Oh, that’s… [ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪ Happy birthday. -And, yeah, you don’t like to
make a big deal. -Oh, no. No big fuss, Jimmy.
-What are you going to do? Do you have any plans?
Anything for your — -Oh, we were going to dinner.
Me and you, right? -Yeah.
-You’re invited. -No, me and you
are going to dinner. I didn’t know if
you wanted to tell everybody. -Yeah. No, we’re going to
dinner, and then — -We’re gonna go to
dinner tonight. Wow. I’m so psyched. -I try to invite anybody rich, because I just want
somebody to buy, ’cause I’m gonna eat
and drink a lot, and — -And you’re not
paying for it, obviously. -No, no.
I’m calling all credit cards. Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep!
-Oh, my God. -I called Chris Rock.
He goes, “I’m in Toronto.” I go, “You can call in
a credit card. I mean, you could surprise me.”
-Yeah. -But, no, it’s —
Oh, one time, you know, I tried to —
You know, Sandler — We always talk about all these
names, not to name-drop — yes, to name-drop —
but also because of old “Saturday Night Live” stories. But Adam once — He always buys
me dinner, you know? He’s a nice guy, and his
wallet’s about 10 feet tall. And then he has to
bend it closed. [ Imitates creaking ] But we were all out —
Or I was out at dinner at some fancy restaurant, and then they go,
“Mr. Sandler’s here.” And I go, “Ooh!” I play it down.
I go, “Who cares?” You know. But then he’s got this whole
back room with 15 people, and they’re having some
big birthday party or something. So, I go in there and I do a few
thirsty bits to get attention. Gross.
And then I come back. But then, when I leave, I go —
It was so sickening. I’m like, “I’m your waiter”
or whatever. -Yeah, yeah. I did that.
I’ve done that. -Everyone’s like, “Get lost.”
-I’ve done that bit. -Yeah. So I go, “All right.” And then, when I leave, I go, “Hey, put this on, you know,
my Discover Card” or whatever. So I charge theirs. The guy goes,
“Sir, his whole thing?” I go, “Yeah.
I’m on TV sometimes. What are you worried about?” So, he goes, “Sure.” You know, and then I’m like,
“Bo-o-o-ing!” Anyway, so, the next day, Identity Guard
calls me and says, “Someone stole your card.” I go, “They did?”
They go, “Yeah. There was some
$9,000 dinner last night.” I go, “Oh, my God.” I go, “That was me.” They’re like,
“It couldn’t have been. You’re not that generous.” I go, “No, I was buzzed.” -You’re not that generous?
-No, no, no, yeah. -They told you that?
-They knew. They could tell. My scrimp —
“We’ve gone over your tips and we realized
you’re a bit of a scrimper.”

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Comments

  1. Spade is still sexy AF after all this time And if you don’t agree with me well you never experienced early Spade he’s the same he’s just a little bit more chill. Same same though

  2. Do kids today even know that you used to run the credit cards through the kachunk-chunk machine? and that every 53rd card would snap in half and make it awkward for everybody?

  3. Without Chris Farley this poor guy doesn't have a career. Lately I've noticed he's been talking about other people's wealth in a joking way but it sounds more like he has some jealousy issues.

  4. Ok jimmy, stop screwing with the greatest president we've ever had….dont let your douche ass producers lead you into hell….be a good boy…admid this country has been great for you!!!! Kag asshole!!!

  5. Funny when extremely wealthy celebrities try to down play their wealth. Spade is worth $60 million dollars. Sure that not the $350 million that Sandler is worth but its still $60 MILLION DOLLARS. You aren’t poor dude.

  6. Adam Sandler has paid the guy hundreds of thousands of dollars per movie and millions over time to be in his movies for 3 to 5 minutes every other year, you can afford 9,000$ on him once in a while.

  7. Oh hard life , life is so hard. Eat what you want when you want it. No worries , electric bill? Ossh never seen it!
    Cable bill? Never seen it, house bill? Ossh I paid cash…

    Yes I love this life too ! More so, I wish this life for all the hard working ppl who make the world go around….nurses, drs, teachers, firemen, police! The Best of the best

  8. How is any dinner $9000 in the first place? WTF? No food is that good. That's an entire car worth of money.

  9. is it weird to say david spade had a glow up? he’s so naturally funny now after years of random roles he’s just funny af and laid back!

  10. My family still hassles me about restaurants I suggested 10 years ago where they each paid 50 bucks.

  11. I don't care how rich you are, you don't need a 9k dollar dinner. This is why every nation under the sun hates Americans.

    Like how do you even sleep at night… Seriously

  12. I’m not an idiotic Christian but if you have a $9,000 in this world of suffering and inequality it is guaranteed that you are going to hell

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