How To Have Fun Without Drinking


Question of the day: So, how do you go out
to events and have fun when you’re not drinking and it seems like everybody else is. So, three
quick tips that will help you with that, because it’s so tough, sometimes. You can have the
right motivation. Everything can be in order, but if you don’t know how to have a good time
when drinking, it’s easy to slide back into that because you’re like, “This sucks,” right?
“I’m standing here in the corner and I’m not talking to anybody. I want to have fun.” So,
here are the three tips. The first one is to take the good parts of
drinking and emulate them. And what I mean by that is that drinking does do some things
for people. We wouldn’t do it otherwise, right? It helps us lower our inhibitions. It makes
us more like we’d introduce ourselves to people. We play stupid, silly games, and what I
see is when people first stop drinking, they think that they have to stop that. They have
to behave proper, they can’t participate in the games. It’s all b.s. So, if there is a
fun drinking game going on, play with water. If people give you a hassle about that, just
go back to the video about “What to Say When You’re Not Drinking.” It has never been a
problem for me. If you are standing there and you see that you’re against the wall,
and people are starting to mingle, and the people getting drunk are starting to get more talkative,
be the more talkative person first, right? If you set it up as a challenge to yourself
to say, “You know what? I’m going to see if I can have more fun, be more outgoing, more
friendly than anybody else here, even though I’m not drinking,” that intention will carry
over into everything that you do, and you’ll find that you have a much better time, because,
one, you’re in control, but, two, you’re still getting a lot of the benefits. Two, change
your state through dancing. Now, the funny thing about dancing is that if you ask people
whenever they’re out, they will tell you that they intend to wait until they’re very, very
drunk before they start dancing, right? “I’m going to dance when I’m drunk.” The funny thing
about that is that dancing and drinking, while they might be, you know, have different requirements,
dancing seems to take a lot of courage, drinking doesn’t. They have the same effect in a lot
of ways. When you go out into the dance floor, and just for two minutes, cut it up, dance
like a maniac, your inhibitions get lower. You feel much more comfortable. You feel more
expressive in your body. You’re more likely to touch people. So, what I highly, highly recommend is that
rather than just staying locked up like this, you know, completely inexpressive, go to the
middle of the dance floor. If there’s not a dance floor, you should bob around. Find
a spot where you feel comfortable. That can be being seen by lots of people. It might
be being seen by nobody in the very center. But for two minutes, take your friends, get
a circle, and set up like a dance party goof-off challenge thing, right, where you just mess
around, and everybody jumps in the middle and does a ridiculous move, and stay there
for two minutes while dancing a ton; not just bobbing back and forth, but getting your elbows
off of the sides, moving your hands. What you will find, and, Amy Cuddy, a scientist
at Harvard did a study on this, is that when you move your body, and you put into what
they call a “power pose,” that’s the standing confident, when you move your body in a fun
pose, and you’re smiling, and laughing, and doing the limbo, and goofing around, your
brain actually will send those sorts of signals that you would get from drinking, which is
to be less inhibited, to not care as much what other people think, and after only two
minutes, you will start to feel differently than you did when you walked onto that dance
floor. It is awesome. It carries over for a long, long time, and, sometimes, through
the duration of the day, event, or night, or wherever you’re at. So, make sure that
you get into your body. You get expressive, man. When you stand against the wall, you
sabotage yourself. And the third thing that it might seem a little
bit downer to do it, but it’s just stop going to events that suck, right? Don’t go to events
where the entire point of it is to get drunk, and there’s no way to have fun there unless
you’re drinking, and there are bars like this. There are some, even, sporting events that
are like this, where nobody cares about the game. The entire purpose is just to drink.
If people invites you to those, you can still go, but I would recommend is a counter offer,
to say, “Hey, man, I can’t make it today, but I was looking at paintball next weekend.
Do you want to come?” Or say, “Hey, man, I can’t make it to that, but I’m getting a group
together to do dinner at my place on Thursday, are you in?” And, when you start to get more
creative like that, well, guess what? You’re doing fun events that people are going to
enjoy way more because you don’t need to be sloshed to do it. But, secondly, you shift
from the spoke of any sort of social environment where you’re being invited, and you’re just
one person of many, to become the hub. You’re the person setting up the fun events because
you’re the only one that truly cares that the event itself is killer, and it is not
just helped along by everybody being drunk, and not knowing what is going on. So, really,
stop going to events that are no fun at all. If you don’t like dance clubs–I happen to–don’t
go to those. Invite your friends, invite people to something else that is fun. And, just some
ideas–paintball, laser tag, bowling, any thing that has an event, and has something
to do there, right? There is an activity that is going to be way more fun. So, hopefully, that helps you to have more
fun when you’re out. If you want more videos like this, I think this is it for the drinking
series, but if there’s more questions, go ahead, ask me. I’ve been doing this for a
long time, happy to help. Write those in the comments. Subscribe to get more from the channel,
breakdowns and everything, and I will see you in the next video.

About the author

Comments

  1. Kind of like dancing… I do jumping jacks. Sometimes before socializing or I go onto a bathroom and do them. It always works! One set of 50 😌

  2. Thanks man. One of those rare channels out here, who provide with valuable videos, that have interesting info and motivation. Decided to stop myself from drinking and bumped into your channel. And it's a double challenge as I'm flying back to my hometown on these NY holidays, which means I will meet my friends and we will definitely go out somewhere, and not to drink in this environment. But I'm in. In this challenge. Cheers! Your friend from Kazakhstan

  3. You are very special person who could teach the humanity how to having fun without drinking. Btw I'm not drinking and am also against to alcohol actually, smoking neither. Congrats Man👍🏻🌅❤️

  4. So instead of rellying on alcohol, we should relly on goofy dancing? Somehow it doesn't follow through the whole logic of your presentation. Still a lot of valid points, though.

  5. Hey ! May I suggest that you offer us a video about how to keep up a conversation, how not to run out of things to say, how to be able to think of the next thing to say?
    They are videos that already exist on that subject, but I am sure you also have good tips to deliver us in our own talented way 🙂

  6. I just stumbled on this video. You make some great points, but there is one glaring flaw. You just tell people to do the things they would do if they were drinking. Uhm, not gonna happen. That's why they drink. Your best advice was to go to non-drinking events. After that you can go to events where drinking is prevalent. I've done it. It's quite easy actually. You don't need to jump out in the middle of the dance floor if you don't want to, but still have fun. It's fun watching all the drunks do that 🙂

  7. Little bit late to the game! I'm off drink for the next while, and my big fear is that I won't be able to loosen up enough. And then I had a brainwave: the only person who knows I'm not drinking is me. And nobody cares if I am or not. No one who is drinking is going to look at me dance and think 'but isn't she sober?' I have found this to be a very liberating thought process!

  8. You helped me decide to stop drinking 6 months ago and I have been much happier ever since. I have taken your advice and recommendations and it's working.

  9. Seriously thank you so much dude! I'm constantly surrounded by drunk people who can't do much without drinking and I used to hate myself for being the only one sober who wanted to have fun without drinking… Guess I should not feel alone for this!

  10. I have a question. how to you apply this to work dinners and lunches that everyone is drinking at the table and its so noticeable if you are the only one to not drink all of sudden, it's very clear for males who needs to entertain clients etc.. where drinking is a must at dinners

  11. I have tried to go out sober to a bar and it is so boring to be there without alcohol, it seems so pointless for me. TO me alcohol is a large part of the fun.

  12. In scotland when you dont drink anymore, people act like youve just said "im not going to breathe air anymore"

  13. The point at 2:50 is spot on! I feel more open, fun, crazy and confident like that without drinking. My friends think I am drunk but I don't even drink. So they get confused lol! We have that natural fun centre in our head! No drinking required!

  14. When is it that you do drink or do you? Also, constantly love your videos! Thank you for taking the time to put these out here!

  15. Your video totally makes sense. I made a good favor to myself by quitting alcohol 4 months back but I kept going all those place and kept hanging out with the same people who wants party and trust me there was not a single moment where I felt that I am enjoying less. Actually, then I used to have even more good time because I was in control of my self all the time and not having a single embarrassing moment that I would regret next day. People say they drink to relax but how you get relaxed if you are having hangovers on very next morning and you don't have energy or mood to do any other interesting activities which you like. I enjoy playing guitar, doing photography and cooking. After I quit alcohol I am able to give more time and energy to those productive activities in weekends which are equally relaxing. Do meditation for even 15 minutes a day it will relax your body more than any booze or drug.
    When you are informed that more than 200 diseases and injuries that can be linked to alcohol consumption including 30 which are only caused by alcohol, when you know quitting it can make you more focused, more healthy and more conscious about your surrounding then it would be foolish to keep drinking meaninglessly.
    And as Jim Rohn says, " Take care of your body, its the only place to live."

  16. The part about the dancing is so true. When I go partying with my friends and I decide not to drink, I just dance and after a short timeI feel like I'm drunk and confident even though I didn't drink anything. At first it might feel awkward dancing while sober but you just have to do it and be aware that no one gives a shit how you dance, they are concentraing on them selves and won't remember anyway.

  17. I'm a bit late but I can't express how relevant this video is to me; I'm moving to London in a few weeks to start uni and I'm a Muslim so I can't drink – it's going to be tough sticking to my convictions but this video made it a tad bit easier!

  18. Dude, I just randomly landed on your channel yesterday and have been watching video after video. GREAT points and I think this is exactly what people should and can be better at. Keep it up!

  19. every year I stop drinking for about 70 days, that's because if you're a muslim and you drink alcohol then to be able to fast in Ramadan (a whole month), then you should stop drinking 40 days before. However I still hangout with people while they drink and I even go out on the weekend, I just don't drink alcohol at all. I can tell you that once you are totally convinced and committed that you won't be drinking, it becomes much easier, I can talk and dance and enjoy my time like everyone. The only thing is that I need to leave when I get tired, around midnight. there is no alcohol to keep me going so i just surrender to my body and bounce off, which is great because i feel better the day after… you just gotta be convinced and committed and that's it. great video cheers.

  20. The most surprising fact about Charlie, is that he is around 28 years old at the time of this video, and today he's 30 and looks like he always does :p

  21. Have u ever had a friend who thinks your weird because u don’t like to drink to get drunk ? And the friend saying he doesn’t wanna be friends with me because of it? Please comment

  22. If you consistently don't drink, and your friends consistently do, it's likely you will part ways in a short amount of time. this is great advice for casual friendships, dating, and in general. But, sober ppl will often get sick of the antics and the being around the habit in general. It's almost like unspoken peer pressure. Not that you should do something you don't agree with, or want to do to fit in. I love the idea of giving an alternative to a "drinking" function. But, if you USED to drink regularly at your place with your friends and you invite them over for dinner, it's automatically assumed there will be drinking with or after dinner. I guess it's better than hanging out in a smoky bar if you don't have any intention of imbibing.

  23. That is one Amazing video man!…what you say makes soo much sense…people are so blinded… Almost everyone ises alcohol as a crutch to have fun!!
    Which is not the case!!!

  24. I love Sobriety I have lots of fun sober, been doing this since 1990 yes I see my friends have to have a couple drinks before they can dance and its funny. Life sober is so much better than when I used to drink, how I did it was lots of AA meetings in the beginning. AA is free and in every city, a wonderful program that's designed perfectly to help you learn the whys and how to stay sober One Day at a Time and you will meet many others like yourself. God Bless to everyone doing this!!!💜

  25. Self knowledge and understanding and accepting who you are. It gets easier as you get older
    But, however hard I try I can't do karaoke or dance, so I am strong willed enough to say no to things that I don't enjoy, or can't do. I hate darts, and am useless at it, I'm indifferent to the game of pool, but I'm very very good at it…..that surprises people because I very rarely play it.

  26. I think only weird and inherently boring people think using substances like alcohol or weed is necessary for having a good time in life. I wish people would shut up saying this crap already.

  27. When people are drunk they act funny which naturally makes you laugh, but then you feel sorry for them as they get drunker and lose control of their behavior and dignity.
    I used to love that side of myself when I had a bit of alcohol as it made me so funny and sociable. But then you have to rely on this external stimulant which is limiting.
    I haven't been drinking for 15 yrs and still have fun with people whom we share a sense of humor. It has to be the right company.

  28. this shit actually works
    Im a 16 year old and I drink way to often just so I can have fun all the time.
    I tried this stuff and it actually works

  29. I don’t understand why alcohol is so ingrained in our culture. We’re told don’t drink until you’re 21, don’t drink in public, don’t over drink, don’t drive drunk, don’t come to work with a hangover, etc. But why then is alcohol so well promoted if we have so many restrictions on it? Why is it expected that you drink in certain settings? Why are you ostracized as being the only sober one in a group of drinkers? Why is it incorporated into our television, movies, novels, and music? Why??? Why?

  30. Well….Mind blown, looking forward to catching up on a million back-logged episodes. Pretty much every idea here, I've felt, but never taken the time to conceive them in a manner which inspires me, new life long subscriber, thanks yo !

  31. I'm not doing that. I'm just not gonna hang out with them when they drink. And if they give me beef, looks like we ain't friends no mo.

  32. I’m wondering what you now order in bars? Water is so boring and soda drinks fill you up after 2… that for me makes it difficult to hold on quitting alcohol.

  33. Very good video 👍👍👍. Me Ove from the band Hollow Illusion from Norway 🇳🇴, have never taste alkohol, being drunk in my life . I am 32 years old,and totally agree never seen the point why I should drink .

  34. I dont drink, and i valuat my ability, i dont need to be freindly to anyone i just need to be feind with valuable people. People who cant enjoy life without drink that s there probleme, i dont juge then for that but if the hate me for not drinking, i will smash the shit out of them.

  35. Try the beach, hiking, snowboarding, fishing, swimming, any sport, or the easiest to do sober: just going out to eat…

  36. Yes that is so True… Don't be scared 2 be your self if your not Drinking. Why because everyone else is getting intoxicated🥃🍷🥂🍸🍹🍻🍺 & your in control😎 so be the Main Attraction😛😜😝

  37. I don't drink anymore and I used to drink only occasionally. Since I decided to quit completely, I have definitely felt the difference. I'm enjoying things and conversations a lot more. I think it's a lot to do with the confidence of knowing I'm never going to slur my words when I'm talking and that staying sharp means I'm more likely to come up with clever things to say.

  38. Here's something I'd like to point out, if you NEED to get drunk, you're not truly having a good time, but instead forcing yourself to ingest a drug just to feel any form of happiness, but why? What's the point of going to an event or gathering only to get drunk and make a fool of yourself? It's something I've never understood. Hell, take camping for instance, people say they love it, but need to get drunk just to have a good time, so at that point, you're not really enjoying the camping itself, you're enjoying getting drunk and using camping as an excuse to do so. So here's something I'd like to challenge you all to do, go to events without ingesting alcohol, see whether it's something you actually enjoy or is it something that's an excuse to consume a drug.

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