Mr Idiot Shastri, did you find my daughter any matches?
– You didn’t find my son a single match yet. I brought a match which you can’t say no to.
– Is it? How does the guy look? He is taller than your daughter. He is good looking.
– How does the girl look? She has a pretty nose and pretty face.
You’ll call her pretty, trust me. Do you’ve any picture? – I Whatsapped it to you.
– The boy is handsome. – The girl is pretty. This is all good, but..
– Why isn’t she married yet? Everything takes time,
that is why marriage didn’t happen yet. Usually, the bride serves coffee.
– Usually, but not here. – And why is that? Because I still see my daughter as a baby.
– Fair enough, but your wife could serve instead. My wife has OCD.
She never steps foot into the kitchen. Well, you could’ve used tissues instead.
– Why? What’s wrong with this? Well, like I said, she has OCD.
She wants even the maid to do chores in silk saree. Seems evident. You kept your house
too clean, like a glass house. Anyways, what is your daughter’s qualification?
– I’m a post graduate. My son is just a graduate. My son has this job
where he hires other people for jobs. Oh! So, he is a HR.
– Everyone says their fate lies in my son’s hands. I hope you don’t work as a receptionist.
– Oh, no. Not at all. She is being funny. Didn’t you tell them about us, Mr Shastry?
– I did. Maybe it slipped their mind. Anyways, let the boy and the girl talk in private.
– How restive. Go on. Go and talk
with the boy in private, child. I stalked your social media. You don’t have many friends.
– I don’t believe too much in having virtual friends. But anyway, I’m the admin of Gully Gang. What are your hobbies?
– Well, I like hanging out on the streets with my pals. But I hate it if I’m judged for having guy pals.
What are your aims in life? I love ice cream.
I hope to set up an ice cream factory someday. If you love ice cream, buy ice cream. Why set up factory?
I’ve some ice cream in the fridge if you want. That’s not what I meant.
– I love road side chicken. Add some onions and lemon and it tastes like heaven.
– Are you sure you did PG? I mean, you don’t sound so. Should people who did PG sound different?
I was born and brought up here, so this is how I sound. Why are you looking so lost?
– Are you sure you’re the girl I saw in the photo? In the photo, you looked like Anushka from Mirchi
but in reality you look like Anushka from Arundathi. Mr Idiot Shastry sent you the most elagant photo of mine.
But I wanted to show my future husband the real me. Now, I believe that you did PG.
– But why did you look so lost? I was looking to marry a graceful lady but you seem like a live wire.
I don’t know what to do. You mean, I don’t look good.
– You do. But you also seem hot headed. And I don’t like hot headed girls.
– And I don’t like guys who look so lost. Cool. Then tell your parents you don’t like this match.
– If you’re a guy, tell them first. – Don’t confuse me. You tell them first.
– So that I take all the blame? Please, you tell them first.
– And I become the villain? Why are you crying now?
– I’m not crying. Guys never cry. But you are crying. So, what do you think?
Does this call for some feast? We’ll have one during the wedding.
– Talk about dowry and all already then. Dowry? I just have one child
and all of my wealth will go to her. I got my share of 40 acres of land
from our ancestral property. I own 50 acres of cultivable land
and 30 acres of coconut fields. And it is impossible to keep track of how much he owns.
– Recently I purchased this jewellry worth lakhs. I purchase jewellry
worth lakhs almost every week. We have, how much is it, 20?
We’ve 20kgs of silver lying in our home’s closet. We’ve a room full of silver.
The room’s key is with my mother-in-law. And where is your mother-in-law?
– She has passed on. Why do you care? Everything that I own is my daughter’s.
– Does your girl know how to cook? She didn’t even serve coffee
and you expect she’d cook? Your daughter doesn’t cook and your wife has OCD.
How do you have your meals? You order food online? We don’t eat restaurant food.
We’ve cooks who cook for us. When my daughter starts staying with you,
I’ll send over a few of those cooks with her. So, let’s talk about your boy now.
As he is into IT, does your son smoke or booze? What nonsense! My son is pure like fire.
– I hope he doesn’t set this place on fire, then. Yuck! You just threw that peel away?
– That is how we do it. I didn’t spot a dustbin, so I threw it randomly.
Ask your maid to clean it up. We keep our place so clean and you litter it?
– What is your problem, lady? You’re creating a mountain out of a peel.
– You didn’t let my wife chide your wife. How will I let you? We’re idiots to believe Mr Idiot Shastry and come here.
– He has no manners at all. – You’re talking about manners? You hang out in the streets and have a crass language.
– Don’t dare insult my language, you scoundrel! What the.. Your daughter called me a scoundrel.
– Because that’s what you are. You think I’ll stand this humiliation?
– Sit this humiliation if you please. Get up! We’ll surely find a better match than this one.
– Mom! What’s happened? Oh, no! She has got a heart stroke.
– You did this to my mom! I’ll call the cops. You’re still sitting. Get up.
Take her to the hospital. Like we don’t know we should.
You stay right here. I’ll go fetch the cops. If anything happens to my wife, I’ll ruin you all.
– Take her to the doctor right now. Sir, say yes to this match,
if you want her to survive. If my mom dies, you guys will be dead too.
– Okay, we approve of your daughter. We are willing
to take this match forward. Are you okay, mom?
Thank God! We’ll set the date for wedding next week.
– Definitely! Keep visiting. – Sure. I’m not asking for hi-five,
I’m asking for my bribe. Greetings, priest.
You are the mutual priest of both our families. So, I want you to help us get married.
– Sure. I know both your families well. Why not tell your parents?
– No! They are dead against love marriages. It isn’t easy, but I’ll see what I can do.
– You need to help us, sir. – Alright. I’ll help you if you pay me Rs. 1 lakh.
– Rs. 1 lakh? – Will you see to it we get married? Don’t worry. Trust me.
– Thank you, sir. Just pay me on time.
– Sure. We’ll pay you right after our wedding.
– Then, I’ll get you both married tomorrow.