SHABBAT DINNER (Gay teen comedy)

October 1, 1999.
Just another SHABBAT DINNER. William get the door! ARNOLD! They’re here! Shit. Come on in. You must be William! I’m Susan, this is David, and this is our son, Virgo.
Come on in. You must be William! I’m Susan, this is David, and this is our son, Virgo. – Nice to meet you.
– Susan! David! A girl. When is she due? You look like you’re about to pop! So tell me, Susan, when is he, she..? Oh and by the way, thank you SO much for supporting the seminary.
So tell me, Susan, when is he, she..? Oh and by the way, thank you SO much for supporting the seminary. David and I really appreciate it. Well of course! Most of our giving is to Jewish causes, it’s so important. William, Mr. Bernstein Cohen is studying now to be a Rabbi. That was the fundraiser daddy and I went to last week. And I said Susan, you’re so good at making invitations, why don’t you help out. And they came out well, very well.. I think? Susan, David, all the way from Queens! What’s Virgo mean? It means I’m adventurous. I was born in September. Virgo just had his birthday last week. Happy birthday little guy! They’re gonna make him captain of the team. He didn’t even like Lacrosse when he started, but I said to him buck up kid, you do what you gotta do to get into college. It’s a ridiculous game, isn’t it? Who can take more AP and honors classes, do more sports… – They’re gonna make him editor of his paper in a few years.
– You’re embarrassing him! Virgo loves to play soccer. Every day he and his friends play, and we have this beautiful field right in Forest Hills. It’s vacant, so we were worried at first about vagrants or rusty nails. But Virgo just loves his soccer.. – Can we be excused?
– Yeah, sure, why don’t you go show Virgo your room? Wanna come see my room? I actually hate Lacrosse. Soccer’s cool, though. Do you have any video games? No, I’m not allowed to. My mom doesn’t even let me watch TV. – It’s pretty lame.
– Yeah, that’s pretty lame. Wanna see my morse code machine? Sure. It’s for people to talk to each other, like captains of ships. I made it in my science afterschool program. What’s that? SOS. It means save our ship. Here, you try. That’s an E. That’s a T. How do you make a V? See.. You have a girlfriend? Naw, I used to. A few years ago. – Her name was Dee.
– Cool I don’t now though. There are some girls I like though. Cool. Do you? I don’t want to talk about it. – What do you mean?
– Nothin’. – It’s, like…
– What? Just forget about it. Okay. I can keep a secret. Promise you won’t be upset. Yeah, sure. Well, the thing is, I’m.. – I’m gay.
– What?
– Nothing. – Nothing, just, you know What, never mind.
– What did you just say? Didn’t you hear what I just said? Is it true? Wow, okay.. Well that’s cool, I mean, I never met a gay guy before. Have you told anyone else? Yeah, like, a friend of mine, a month ago. Why did you tell me? It kind of felt good to say it, like I could kinda be myself. Was your friend okay with it? Yeah, he was okay with it, But my other friends say stuff that make me think they wouldn’t be okay with it. But this guy… we hooked up. – you hooked up with a guy?
– Yeah. What did you…do? Stuff. – Have you told your parents?
– Yeah. – When?
– Yesterday. Wow. What did they say? They were okay with it. My mom cried, but she’s pretty crazy. My dad said that god creates everyone equally. Wow. Parents suck. but it’s cool that you have the balls to say it. I mean, I’m not, but I don’t think I’d have the balls to say it if I was. I mean, everyone has still been very friendly. So does Virgo have a girlfriend? No, no, Virgo doesn’t have a .. girlfriend right now. We don’t really ask him about that s– William is a serial dater. He actually just broke up with his girlfriend. Wasn’t Jewish. But surely she wouldn’t have to be Jewish? Oh, Jesus. No I wouldn’t let my kid marry a goy. Our race has been persecuted for centuries. We finally have a state of Israel. – If we intermarried there would be none of us left.
– Well I think.. ..I think.. You know what, nothing, nevermind. – What?
– Susan– – I think that’s racist.
– Who wants dessert? – You think it’s racist to keep kosher?
– Now really, Susan.. – You’re a rabbi, right?
– Studying to be– So you know, marrying Jewish is one of the rules, just like keeping kosher, which I do because I’m a good jew. Well, I would say that being a good jew is about respect and tolerance. For some people it’s more spiritual. You mean some people don’t respect the law. I’m a lawyer– – Arnold.
– I deal with rules. A religion is a set of rules. You don’t get to pick– So I got this new ice cream. Beth Horowitz told me about it. – I’m sorry, never mind.
– Gluten free, dairy free, soy free… God knows what is IN this ice cream! Who wants to try? – I’ll have a taste.
– Perfect. I will help! We can play trivia. Okay. Can I ask you a question? Sure. How did you know you were gay? I don’t know. I just knew. I mean, you don’t always know. I looked at guys and thought I was interested. I kissed girls and wasn’t. It’s all on a spectrum, you know? Yeah. I mean, haven’t you ever looked at a guy and thought about him sexually? Yeah, a few times. What was it like to kiss a guy? It was like kissing a girl, except more, more manly. What did you do? Just, stuff. Can I ask you something? Yeah. Okay. Do you want to hook up? Wow. Dude, you’ve got balls to ask that. What if I kicked your ass? I can’t. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that. I’m not gay. Oh, okay, um..
I’m not gay. Oh, okay, um..
No it’s okay Um.. Oh, okay, um..
Do you wanna play trivia? Do you wanna play trivia? That was so cool. Yeah, okay. – You’re shaking.
– So are you. Wait, wait– You will not believe what happened to me yesterday! I am outside of H&H, and this woman comes up to me on the street, and she says what a beautiful burka. I didn’t know that your people could wear such bright colors. – And then you said..
– I said It’s not a burka it’s a poncho! Your son seems like a nice boy. Maybe he’ll rub off on William. – Well..
– Rebecca, this was just lovely. Yes. William! – Virgo!
– Shiiit! Look man I’m not– ‘m not gay. – Write your phone number.
– William! Well have a safe trip back! We’ll have to have you over soon. Say, in three weeks? I think we’re free. We’ll double check our calendar, but I think that’s good. – See you then!
– Bye. Well, that was lovely.

About the author


  1. I don't get the Jewish issue. The main points of the film were coming out and parental stupidity. Couldn't Buddhism or Lutheranism have worked just as nicely? Or why was religion introduced in the first place?

  2. cool. guys hooking up while their parents are yuking it up.  and ya know what?  no teen pregnancies.  "write down your number"  LOLOLOL

  3. this was just brillant. I love how dreadfully awkward the boys were, how uncomfortable the conversation got with the parents, and how fake, yet somehow so real everything seemed. The age of the actors, in my opinion, just made it all the better and comically awkward. In so many films everything seems so easy, like you just know exactly what to do when you start questioning everything. Your film made me laugh, smirk, and feel dreadfully sorry for poor William. Great work!!

  4. Ever notice how close people's heads are in movies and TV? It would be quite uncomfortable> These guys are sitting quite close too. An interesting conversation.

  5. OMFG I swear I love it! Believable characters and cast. Adorable connection between the lads. And ending open to a few directions. How will the orthodox dad deal with William? How will the lads go on? What will Virgo's parents say if they know, given their more liberal and open-minded version of Judaism? Totally deserves all those awards!

  6. It wasn't exactly a comedy, but as a little film about two awkward teenagers just finding out about their sexuality and one of them deciding he'll try the gay option and decides it's for him, it was really well done, with some great lines.

  7. Two best lines, ….."I hope he "rubs off" on William" and, "Look man, I'm not gay, …….write down your number!" Cute, HOT and, sweet!

    It's such a shame that gay men/boys have these mental hang-ups, and it's all because of societies inability to accept and cope with reality.

  8. LOL Who names there child Virgo?? I could imagine hippy Christians or atheists but not even modern Jews.
    And how is she having a baby with a son in high school??
    I would have loved this to see a full length feature of this. There is certainly enough potential story and dying to know what happens with the lads. It would be a roller coaster of events, emotions and debates. The bigoted narrow minded against the tolerant and loving parents.
    Wonderful film although a bit thin on the Shabbat theme. Seemed more like an average dinner at home. If they were kosher they would have lit candles and said the prayer. Also, the amount of food she was preparing was wholly not Jewish but more resembled dinner at the estate of English gentry or aristocracy. Jews like Italians prepare enough for an army even for 6 people. :-))

  9. The script, the casting, the dialogue, the direction, all were totally unrealistic and ridiculous: it all sounded exactly like my family, except no pearls, no hard liquor, only undrinkable red wine. The very Jewish kid with acne was so beautifully awkward, adorable, and intense: the guy going down on him at least he did not have to worry about foreskin and smegma. I would love to smell the second date.

  10. A comedy. How refreshing. Awkward but genuine. If only I had met a William or a Virgo in my teen years. I might be a happier man today. "I'm not gay." "Write down your number." Shit. They deserve all the happiness they can find. We all do. I want those boys to have all the awkward, confusing, raunchy sex they can. Let them become real men.

  11. Instant magique ou l'amour est plus fort que nos blablas conceptuels de ce qui doit être ou ne pas être… Bravo pour ce bonheur fou, d'un désire irrésistible et merveilleux Je vous adores.

  12. Magic moment or love is stronger than our conceptual blasas of what must be or not to be … Bravo for this crazy happiness, an irresistible desire and wonderful I adore you.

  13. I watch this EVERY time that I stumble upon it. Could have been a great tv series or full length movie too.

  14. Actors are too old to be playing those roles. The dialogue was terrible. The filming was subpar. The storyline was cliched.

  15. I liked it and I thought it was cute. But I would have had to tell that one boy please close your mouth a little before you're coming at me to give me a kiss. Coming at a person with your mouth wide open can be a bit of a turn off. Closed mouth lip to lip first then work your way into the rest. I'm sure that was actually the point of the movie to make it look awkward between two teens that had really not experienced that before

  16. Why couldn't Graydon just invite Ben to join himself and Chris….. surely he would want to introduce his boyfriend to his old high school friend ?

  17. It was kind of ridiculous, just like real life. It was so uncomfortable to watch, and so familiar, does that make it good? I think it does. Normal is just a made up concept.

  18. father complains about dating a non-Jew while his wife is played by a ginger and his son is gay and doesn’t even look jew To be honest the only one that looked Jew was the one that said he was gay.

  19. This MUST be based off true events, because it's so real and authentic aND genuinely hilarious that you couldn't make this up!

  20. that was one of the most true to life short films I think I've seen in a long time. cute awkwardness, still being afraid of who you are and coming out to yourself… which to me coming out to yourself is often harder then coming out to the person you most afraid to come out to I.E. parent, friends, whoever. I can see his family taking a little more time to deal with it but it's clear to me his mother loves him his dad may need more time but it is just fear and when his father can let go of the fear he can deal with who his son is. and his d and d should be happy too his first probable boyfriend would be of the Jewish faith lol

  21. I really like it when I see guys that age figuring out their sexuality. I was about 13 and got me 1st BJob from an older boy while we were out on a Boy Scout camping trip. Hey Danny!

  22. I love this film, it’s one of my favorites and I watch it frequently. I love how William is practicing urging Virgo on the whole time and keeps saying how cool everything is yet still denies he is gay. Plus the whole awkwardness of the situation really adds to the humor.

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