– What up party people! Back to school fashion; New year, new you. We’ve decided to challenge five change to see who sells the best back to school fashion. The catch?. They don’t know they’re competing. They don’t even know they’re in this video. We’re just gonna shop at five stores, wear the outfits advertised on their mannequins and see what happens. If I roll up to school day one dressed like this, I’m here to f**k s**t up. All on a brand new season of Candid Competition. *whispering* Candid Competition! It’ll be fun!
*camera clicks* Or maybe it’ll be a disaster, and then children will know who sells the best outfits, as modeled by me, an adult. man. *upbeat intro song* Think that there was always an excitement about back-to-school right? It’s like Who am I gonna be this year? I could totally reinvent myself. Of course every year. I was exactly the same buy new notebooks new pens This is the year that I finally get it together elementary school. Mom dresses Yeah middle school is the first time when you start to sprout your little baby wings and say no mom. I’m gonna dress myself Yeah But also I would like you to pay for it mom So today we’re gonna hit up Target, Gap JCPenney, Walmart, Kohl’s going to leave it up to the brands and what they want to show us so I am only going to dress Based on what the mannequins there are wearing again Children’s club children’s clothes, we’re gonna be judging the outfits on Christ comfort and style I really don’t know what to expect today Is it gonna be like cool kids or is gonna be like, ah, you know things haven’t changed Target so I’m not like a Hashtag target girl, but there really is so much to do once target added a Starbucks really shames the game. Wow. These are school uniforms I was gonna say what lame children. Wow, this is funny. I woulda worn those. They’re already selling Halloween stuff This is exciting kids are fearless Kids are brave. I was none of these things as a kid. It’s ugly but it’s him wait are kids wearing little joggers This is hip stuff. I see a lot of great stuff in here. But really these are our two choices I like this because his outfit says suburban white boy his post says he’s about to drop the best mixtape of 2018 (Zach laughing as Zach does) This totally is you. 100% – Keith- Told ya I shopped at Target. Zach- it’s totally more me. This is Ned. Keith- This is Ned. Zach- So far, we’ve found the three of us I haven’t found Eugene yet. There’s no Eugene at Target. That’s a fair point. A child’s l-. Child’s large is pretty close to me I think that’s gonna fit. All this time I’ve been like trying to find the form-fitting clothes in the adult section all that I could have just been shopping with the kids. You know, I like that boys These days are willing and comfortable wearing pink new year new me Where did you shop growing up? As a kid, my mom brought me to gap and I hated gap I made my mom take me to like skateboarding shops. And then I would just buy clothes that were way too big for me I don’t know if gap has changed but my impression of it is still that it’s for lame people This is Baby Gap. I own that sure you do own this around that shirt. I own that jacket I’ve definitely wor-.Wow. Wait a minute. Are you a hot, baby? Thank you. We got some hip kids to choose from they’re very progressive. Very forward here. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah The gap asked us not to film. However, we found some super cute outfits I actually got to say I was very impressed with the looks there tons of different mannequins a lot of different styles to show off frankly a lot of things that I would and do wear and now we’re on to the next store which is JC Penney doin it right. I don’t think I’ve ever been in the JCPenney. I don’t think I’ve been doing it right boring boring boring It’s cool. But he’s a he’s a big kid. This guy’s taller than you! This kid came back from summer break with a mustache growth spurt hit him hard. This is what we thought we would be getting Wow, that’s a good joke. It’s funny. It’s stupid. This is what young Sheldon would wear. School bus. Boop boop beep beep. Slowly zoom behind me. They have the Jojo Siwa line. Oh wow. Keith I know we are going to do if when you just go back look at the toys for one second. which toys you can look at All no we can’t look at all the toys. You can look at one aisle. I’ll pick your aisle. One aisle? I’ll pick aisle really and then I can buy anything in the aisle. It’s ned’s credit card. I don’t care what you do with it (zach being excited) (cheerful music over zach hula hooping) (zach bumps into a shelf poor zach) All right, well, I think we should leave New year new me I don’t want to spin into those people. What up Walmart. What up Zack Grocery pharmacy and so much more eat your pills and fills your eats Huh go back big that’s what I’m talking about. So we’re how super store warehouse Superstore. Whoa. Damn, it’s a shark in space shred in a guitar. I think those are pajamas I don’t care Wow Walmart when Walmart’s. Excuse me Different chicken. Yeah, well, that’s clever What a bounty look at all these soders. I wish I could be them. They got Tostitos. This is a cool Look, I want to look like this kid. Let’s find that outfit. A whole wall of milk You can grill. The dinosaur fashion at Walmart. Hot. Oh look Put it back We haven’t done any of them. Yeah, it’s very loud Keith we have a problem what there are no mannequins here. There’s a boy on a ball on a picture Oh Boy, Rick, I don’t see any back to school man. Shut up Morty!Get a hold of yourself Morty. I hate to say this Keith, but Without mannequins. I don’t have a point of reference of what to dress that I think Walmart has to be eliminated I don’t want to do that again! Again I wanted to win my heart New Year same me same competition I love Kohl’s, I Got all my clothes for high school at Kohl’s. They all look like you Keith. Yeah All these outfits are awful. Whoa look pretty handsome to me This is honestly who I could be this is who I want to be when I was a kid I wanted so badly to be a skating kid and I wore the clothes But I was kind of terrified of skateboarding. I had a lot of friends who were very good skateboarders So one day, you know, we all went out together. We got to the top of the hill. It was my first time skateboarding (fearsome music) They just went down and I’m like, oh, okay, cool So I went down the hill but as I was going down the hill I realized there was a stop sign ahead They never told me how to slow down or stop So I freaked out and I just jumped off the board. I stumbled I fell down I rolled around I cut up my my hands my knees And so I just kept like limping after them and it was one of those things where I held the pain in For about two hours and as soon as I got home I started crying I think now as an adult I can finally accept that. I’m not you (attempts to kiss mannequin?) I don’t know what else to say New Year new (candid competition) It’s fashion time We have our four outfits from Target Kohl’s Gap and JCPenney in a moment of silence for the competitors that we lost along the way (sad music for walmart’s continuous elimination in this competition rest in peace walmart) (distorted) a wHOLE WALL OF MILK Let’s just get into it, huh up first is target do we know how much these costs? This is my first time trying on children’s clothes since I’ve been children, there are 16 Which means they’re made for 16 year olds, they may not fit They fit perfectly Wow. Wow, that’s amazing on you does it look good? Let’s see, oh Wow. Oh, wow. I look like a sim starter pack character, right? Like I look more like a computer-generated Version of me than a real human the sour patch kid became a rapper in the early 2000 This is what he would look like. You know, I was kind of expecting that these clothes would look very funny on me there’s that I think he’s very well. Well, I’m just a spin you want a spin? Yeah, big camera a spin Could we see the butt? yeah, you can see the butt. why not hmm, you know, not much going on I think that’s less targets fault and more Margo and Adams fall. Those are my parents. Oh All in all this is a good outfit. I am impressed with how stylish this look is I think it plays better on my boyish body than it did on the boyish mannequin. All right up next Kohl’s So Kohl’s is where Keith Habersberger shopped as a kid, and if you ever forget it, just look at what they sell Wow, those are some baggy jeans. I am getting the hardcore Jenko flashbacks I used to rock Jenko as a kid. I looked dumb. I don’t think this outfit benefits from having a shirt underneath it You’re like Kohl’s or the nineties were coming back and they were like, ooh, let’s focus on the bad part. There are adult men everywhere Dressed like this. In fact, this is like pre queer eyes Zach. I’m tiny be like, oh my goodness. What is that? Go just going on with this outfit. It’s far too boxy We need to do something about these pants throw them up and show a little bit of ankle And then now we need to talk about confidence for the price. I’m not super impressed with the quality This isn’t even a bootcut. This is a Regular fit maybe it’s not my regular It’s awful. It looks great. I don’t know we were talking about I think it’s an awesome outfit. I think it was good I would roll up the sleeves a little bit maybe halfway button of the button-down I could have fulfilled my skater boy dreams instead. I look like Keith Next what’s going on with that flower. This was I was an iron-on. So you chose that. Yeah, I chose that I’m a bad boy. This one. They only had a 14. I’m just gonna warn you right now. I don’t think I’m gonna fit Looks great, dude Wow Amazing. I’ve never looked better the most fun part about shopping in the children’s section is that I get to be the big boy do I look genuinely cool or do I look like a teddy bear got dressed up and came to life I’m just gonna go ahead and say that I owe gap an official apology. I just I thought it was a nerdy store This is a cool outfit I Always had that dream of like having that summer glow up it never happened I believe this is too high fashion for a kid what keep you know is showing off ankles like that G for gap? No.. g for gee Wow That’s cool outfit. See wow. That’s cool It is also the most expensive by far what child is worth a hundred dollars They’re gonna have grow it like this drop in a hundred dollars on a single outfit it feels reckless Maybe a reckless is just the kind of guy I am Maybe I’m just a bad boy. All right Keith- We should move on. Probably should but will we? Oh Man, it’s JCPenney. Take a look now. It’s JCPenney What’s the song? oo oo. God our first ones that Zach groaning over tightness of pants Keith- they look good They feel awful JCPenney you get the ankle seal of approval Zach laughing Yeah, you’re boring me no you’re overreacting You make a boron joke, very good. Very good This is so funny Yeah This is very similar to Kohl’s but just totally better the jeans are better fit the over shirts of better material and the undershirt So soft. I think this is a great look. However, this is not the look that was advertised if you will I Don’t look like such a giant nerd now This shirt was cute. The pants are a good fit look like a dweebus Oh Bazinga, I definitely look like a kid But I don’t feel like a big boy. I Feel like a boy the little pricey I realized as I’m talking about through I have no gauge for how much children’s clothes should cost (candid competition) It is time for my final decision Fourth place is easy Kohl’s. You may be good enough for Keith, but you are not good enough for me Third place was tough JCPenney. I loved your outfit you almost ran away with it However, your styling of the mannequin left some things to be desired And for that reason this is where I leave you to. First place is a toss-up Do I give it to Gap clearly the coolest outfit but at what cost? Or do I give it to target with a fashionable and sensibly priced outfit? I have made my decision and I shall reveal the winner to you now in a classic back-to-school photo shoot At the end of the day it’s not about the stores that sell the clothes but the kids who wear them (cheerful music playing over montage) Any outfits of back-to-school outfit as long as you feel good wearing them New year new me indeed. I said that in front of every store ( even more cheeful music over photoshoot from target) My ti-89 calculators out of batteries again, do you want to go with me to the dance? Okay, I understand And at the end of the summer the world hadn’t changed. I changed Here’s the deal this video is not sponsored by tide but it could be so we’re gonna film a quick little tide music video just in case (friendly and upbeat reminder to not eat tide pods, because some people don’t know this already) We need your money tide